NO FUCKING SHIT DUMBASS TECH GUY.

This HP support guy is an idiot.

"HI whaht izh your proubleum"

"Ran the HP Diagnostics, and Im getting a 303 SMART error at startup, along with some squealing, it sounds like the berings are going out of the hard drive"

"Okee, du u haev the cohmputer in front ov you raight now?"

"Well, its unplugged cuz its not working, hold on"
...
*PLugs in*

"Ok do u see the keyboard?"

"...Yes.."

"See the fuhnction keys on it? f1 F2, etc"

"Yeah..."

"Press F2 When starhting it up"

*Does so*

"Ok its testing"

"Ok"

"Ok, it says SMART error 303... Like it always has."

"Oh, I see, this appeahrs to be a hard draive error. I will connect yoo with lv. 2 Servihce"

and im thinking

NO FRIKKING SHIT I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT -__-

Holy crap. This dude was my childhood, and I thought he was only Fry from Futurama o_O;