A very bipolar day :(
Jul. 12th, 2007 09:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
caitaroWell..
This morning i woke up.. at 10.. and im like "well ill get up early so perhaps emily can call or whatever"
Because of gettin up at 10.. and not 3.. i felt abnormaly angry.. I just felt like rawrawrawrwrwr for a long time.
Then Danielle came over and demanded that I help her with her myspace..
Then Shane came over..
we did various things.. it was fun..
Then i talked to Emily on the net and she said that she'd call me at 5-6 to come over ^^..
emily, 7/12/2007 2:58:31 PM:
I'm not sure how long it's gonna take, but I should be done around 5 or 6
^proof. Lol
I have some other stuff.. but thats gunna be a private entry.. if you wanna read, just log onto my account.. you know the PW XD
anyway So eventually emily never called.. and shes not on IM..
:\
So me + shane were playin stuff and we played rhapsody.. and omg ;-; im so efing jelous of cornet..
Because she <3s prince ferdenand.. and he is sooooooo cute ;-;;-;;-;-;-;-;-;;;; and awww ;-;-;-;;;;;;-;-;;;-;-;--;-;;;;;
and im jelous.. she has someone she loves.. and we find out he loves her back.. (he says so in the song?)
and im jelous.. Beacuse i dont... and 99% chance never will -_-...
And if i do get caught up in another guy... For example. Roko.. (WHO hasnt been on since the 2nd time i talked to him >_>) Kevin.. I thought we had something going there.. But the things he does is very fishy.. and.. i dont want to deal with fishy anymore... and not to mention.. Hes hardly on anymore.. When he is, he doesnt talk to me :| IRL, HAH! Noone would ever want me, IRL. Don't even go there.
Either way, it wont be anything truely..
Because of human nature.. and how i act.. i believe it is physically.. uhm.. impossible for anyone to love me for an extended period.. well pretty much for any period of time..
mentally.. Oh god.. In my dreams, I always have /my/ 'prince'.. and everythings so amazing.. I feel warm and happy and actually WANTED for once..
..which is why sleep is the only person i long for now.. The only place i dont feel pain and rejection...
I was crying a few minutes ago.. Dad's talking about snoop again.. Shes getting worse.. I dont know what to do..
I have a headache.. My eyes burn and my cheeks feel very heavy.. :\
-----
I havent mentioned this in this journal before, id ont think..
But me and shane have virtually switched roles..
He used to say "Love is fake! It doesnt exist, etc. etc." While I was deeply involved with Sp00ny..
I feel like im in that movie "just my luck"
Only, i never kissed shane to transfer my 'luck' to him.. XD (that he knows of, anyway.. im kidding XD)
Just my luck was only some stupid movie though.. Where they could transfer the luck from person to person at will.
The guy who was never lucky.. he got lucky.. he seemed so happy.. That must be how shane felt.. Well before saturday anyway? He still has someone though, even if he cant talk to them..
It's a lot more than having noone at all.
Lindsey Lohan (Who played the lucky -> unlucky girl) she dealt with it so much better.. but perhaps thats cuz............... its a stupid ass movie and theres no truth to it at all *STABS IT*
and with that, i leave you some lyrics...
Why am I always feeling down?
Why am I always so afraid?
Why? Why have I given up hope?
...
I give up hope, I just can't cope
Can't give my all much longer
... From a game called Rhapsody: A musical adventure..
...and this song from the same game, is stuck in my head XP
(Cornet)
I know that you're out there and I'm waiting for you!!!
Cornet is my name and I'm a puppeteer too
With my puppet friends there's nothing that we can't do
They are there to help me make my dreams come true
And once you get to know them they just might help you too
And all the puppets in the world will help me find my way to you
I know that you're out there and I'm waiting for you
(Kururu)
There she goes again she's so in love as if lightning struck her from above
(Cornet)
"But it did!"
(Kururu)
I love you my prince, you are my true love
Cornet, won't you stop your silly dreaming please
(Cornet)
"That's not true. Can't you see?" I'm just trying to make my dream come true
(Kururu)
"Dressed like that?"
(Cornet)
I've done everything a girl's supposed to
I take a bubble bath, even wash being my ears Oh!
All the bubbles tickle my nose but they get me squeaky clean
And when I'm done I'm looking beautiful
(Kururu)
Cornet, you are a silly girl
You must look further than just mere appearances to see
"Cornet, are you following this?"
"What's important is"
What's inside of you
(Cornet)
"What's inside of me?"
(Kururu)
Don't you understand what I am saying to you?
Look inside yourself and you will find out what is true
You must be courageous and be true to your heart
It will make you happy when you know just where to start
(Cornet)
I see it's what's inside of me
(Kururu)
"Yes, what's inside of you!"
(Cornet)
Someday I'll find my love
He'll be the one for me
I will be waiting patiently until he comes
(Kururu)
"I told you don't wait! You take the initiative!"
(Cornet)
Now I remember, think for myself
(Kururu)
"Yeah, that's it!"
(Cornet)
I know I'll find him and he will be the man of my dreams
(Both)
We'll share our lives as one until the end of time
Someday our hearts will beat as one
This morning i woke up.. at 10.. and im like "well ill get up early so perhaps emily can call or whatever"
Because of gettin up at 10.. and not 3.. i felt abnormaly angry.. I just felt like rawrawrawrwrwr for a long time.
Then Danielle came over and demanded that I help her with her myspace..
Then Shane came over..
we did various things.. it was fun..
Then i talked to Emily on the net and she said that she'd call me at 5-6 to come over ^^..
emily, 7/12/2007 2:58:31 PM:
I'm not sure how long it's gonna take, but I should be done around 5 or 6
^proof. Lol
I have some other stuff.. but thats gunna be a private entry.. if you wanna read, just log onto my account.. you know the PW XD
anyway So eventually emily never called.. and shes not on IM..
:\
So me + shane were playin stuff and we played rhapsody.. and omg ;-; im so efing jelous of cornet..
Because she <3s prince ferdenand.. and he is sooooooo cute ;-;;-;;-;-;-;-;-;;;; and awww ;-;-;-;;;;;;-;-;;;-;-;--;-;;;;;
and im jelous.. she has someone she loves.. and we find out he loves her back.. (he says so in the song?)
and im jelous.. Beacuse i dont... and 99% chance never will -_-...
And if i do get caught up in another guy... For example. Roko.. (WHO hasnt been on since the 2nd time i talked to him >_>) Kevin.. I thought we had something going there.. But the things he does is very fishy.. and.. i dont want to deal with fishy anymore... and not to mention.. Hes hardly on anymore.. When he is, he doesnt talk to me :| IRL, HAH! Noone would ever want me, IRL. Don't even go there.
Either way, it wont be anything truely..
Because of human nature.. and how i act.. i believe it is physically.. uhm.. impossible for anyone to love me for an extended period.. well pretty much for any period of time..
mentally.. Oh god.. In my dreams, I always have /my/ 'prince'.. and everythings so amazing.. I feel warm and happy and actually WANTED for once..
..which is why sleep is the only person i long for now.. The only place i dont feel pain and rejection...
I was crying a few minutes ago.. Dad's talking about snoop again.. Shes getting worse.. I dont know what to do..
I have a headache.. My eyes burn and my cheeks feel very heavy.. :\
-----
I havent mentioned this in this journal before, id ont think..
But me and shane have virtually switched roles..
He used to say "Love is fake! It doesnt exist, etc. etc." While I was deeply involved with Sp00ny..
I feel like im in that movie "just my luck"
Only, i never kissed shane to transfer my 'luck' to him.. XD (that he knows of, anyway.. im kidding XD)
Just my luck was only some stupid movie though.. Where they could transfer the luck from person to person at will.
The guy who was never lucky.. he got lucky.. he seemed so happy.. That must be how shane felt.. Well before saturday anyway? He still has someone though, even if he cant talk to them..
It's a lot more than having noone at all.
Lindsey Lohan (Who played the lucky -> unlucky girl) she dealt with it so much better.. but perhaps thats cuz............... its a stupid ass movie and theres no truth to it at all *STABS IT*
and with that, i leave you some lyrics...
Why am I always feeling down?
Why am I always so afraid?
Why? Why have I given up hope?
...
I give up hope, I just can't cope
Can't give my all much longer
... From a game called Rhapsody: A musical adventure..
...and this song from the same game, is stuck in my head XP
(Cornet)
I know that you're out there and I'm waiting for you!!!
Cornet is my name and I'm a puppeteer too
With my puppet friends there's nothing that we can't do
They are there to help me make my dreams come true
And once you get to know them they just might help you too
And all the puppets in the world will help me find my way to you
I know that you're out there and I'm waiting for you
(Kururu)
There she goes again she's so in love as if lightning struck her from above
(Cornet)
"But it did!"
(Kururu)
I love you my prince, you are my true love
Cornet, won't you stop your silly dreaming please
(Cornet)
"That's not true. Can't you see?" I'm just trying to make my dream come true
(Kururu)
"Dressed like that?"
(Cornet)
I've done everything a girl's supposed to
I take a bubble bath, even wash being my ears Oh!
All the bubbles tickle my nose but they get me squeaky clean
And when I'm done I'm looking beautiful
(Kururu)
Cornet, you are a silly girl
You must look further than just mere appearances to see
"Cornet, are you following this?"
"What's important is"
What's inside of you
(Cornet)
"What's inside of me?"
(Kururu)
Don't you understand what I am saying to you?
Look inside yourself and you will find out what is true
You must be courageous and be true to your heart
It will make you happy when you know just where to start
(Cornet)
I see it's what's inside of me
(Kururu)
"Yes, what's inside of you!"
(Cornet)
Someday I'll find my love
He'll be the one for me
I will be waiting patiently until he comes
(Kururu)
"I told you don't wait! You take the initiative!"
(Cornet)
Now I remember, think for myself
(Kururu)
"Yeah, that's it!"
(Cornet)
I know I'll find him and he will be the man of my dreams
(Both)
We'll share our lives as one until the end of time
Someday our hearts will beat as one
