No sleep

Jul. 1st, 2013 07:44 pm
caitaro: (Default)
Oh I wiiiiiiiiiiiiish I could sleeepp~ but noooooooo.

Guess I'll have a minor distraction.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqijsweJzFQ
Ragnarok Prontera Theme
Ragnarok Prontera THEM
This has nothing to do with my online life... But i feel disgusted that I can't post it on my real life account, for fear of "random unfriendings" (yes yes i know, if they unfriend you then they aren't worth it anyway) but MEH, I have to take what i can get IRL! Q_Q

And I need to vent, otherwise I will just cry all night and be pent up...

I feel disgusted that no one will tell me the truth. Espe...cially people that I feel "closest" to. If my house is a mess and it looks terrible... Tell me. Dont wait till i re-organize it then say "WOW YOUR HOUSE LOOKED LIKE SHIT, BUT ITS BETTER NOW!"

I ask time and time again... "Why does noone want to hang out with me? Why is everyone friendly until I attempt an "Outside of facebook" social setting?"

I am told "There's nothing wrong with you, Cait. Dont worry"

But I know it's a lie. If there was nothing wrong with me, then people would ask me to go out with them all the time... not once every 10 years.

Am I boring? Does the fact I throw out random statistics and pop culture references make me undesirable to be around? Do I smell? Am I too ugly to be seen with in public?

I see co-workers hang out together, and I feel sad. This rules out the "There's nothing wrong with you Cait, it's just that they dont have time to" excuse that gets thrown at me occasionally. Noone wants to hang out with me. Noone invites me to go shopping or paint walls or go for a walk or bike ride or thrift shopping or berry picking.

I wish I was okay with being a hermit and alone and holed up away from society, but there's some instict going on that says "Be around people" "Ba a part of the group" and DRIVES me to WANT to be involved with other people....

I CANT shut it off, and I feel trapped. I want to enjoy my life away from these untrustworthy lying backstabbing meatsacks.. I want to enjoy being alone... Coding for hours and hours and just being happy with that... But I cant.

So I must write a letter.

Dear Instincts:

Please shut off... or go to hell

thx

, Cait

RO!

Jun. 28th, 2013 07:44 pm
caitaro: (Default)
Kitty-Themed RO server!


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caitaro: (Default)
Yeah so...

i went to sk00l today...

my car was leaking something.. I duno what it was..

the lady beside me kept looking at my drawing >___<<

i was sweating horridly at sk00l...

The comps were downloading at 50kb/s -_-

Got to meh eye appt i was 1/2 hr early so i played dr. mario on my GBAMP

soi go up there at 12:50 and


and the door was LOCKED>. noone was there..

so i waited on the porch for like 15 mins..

these little kids were up on the porch too...


then they came.. it was lunch time i guess..

and i was in there.. they asked me things.. some things i didnt even know >.<

then the one lady wasnt back so the guy started me.. and there was paperwork i was carrying EVERYWHERE >_<


so then after 6 hrs, i found some glasses i liked..

and the frame was discontinued >_<

so then i had to find ANOTHER pair... so i found some eventually..

They are rounder than the ones i got now.. which is good..


and the guy was like o_O and i was randomly talking to them an di duno why and sooo embarrasd >_<


so then i went to family doller so that i could get some cups + straws for cory..

and so i go and i get the cups which were either 1.00 or 1.89... they werent marked well >_> and then straws were 1.00 and i HAD 3$ and very little change.

so i asked for an application.. and they were like "well we're not hiring right now" and im lik e"o_O" cuz theres a BIG SIGN in the front door saying "now hiring"
and with tax n stuff it should have been 3.05-ish.. but it was 3.18 and i was like "um i dont think thats right?" and shes like "WELL IT IS. the cups were $2" BUT I KNOW THEY WERENT!!!!!!!!!1 So i was FREAKIN out cuz id idnt have that much..

well at least i didnt think i did.. i had a nickle and a buttload of pennies.. so i was like "err well i dont have the 18 cents" and shes like "okay well if youhave 5 the rest is here"

and im like okay.. and omg i was soo effing embarrased and so i gave her the erst of my pennies and thanked her and left >_<

and omg
;-;

I almost cried on the way home.. i took the back way cuz i was sooo upset..

So i got home and.. hward was heer and i got meh calculator out and they DID overcharge me.. the cups WERE 1.89 i KNOW IT..

so howard and cory weer on cop AND tv soo
i went in my room and sleeped for an hour~ or so..

So tehn i got up and told dad what happened and hes like "its not a big deal, it happens to a lot of people"

and i started crying cuz im ALWAYS AFRAID that thats gunna happen to me and it did ;-; and i guess i was lucky the lady was... not pissed or something.. and

its like.. sure it happens to a lot of people but i GO WAYYYY OUT OF MY WAY to make sure it NEVER happens to me...


So here i am..

completely upset over 12 god damned cents.

I feel horrid.

so im playin NullRO cuz.. i feel crappy adn whatnot..

and my client is teh shiz... 'n stuff :(

and pants
;-;

<3 <3

May. 5th, 2007 02:15 am
caitaro: (Default)
Yes you may.. be frightened by the <3 in my subject. XD

>:3

anyway.. so i was on RO.. trying to get some awesome equips.. when someone announced

"Looking for intelligent english speaking people @go 13!"


So i went..

and that guy was talking to a few people
then they left..

then it was just

me.
Him
Roko
Gluttony.Novice
XM person

and lke some other person..

so we talked for awhile..
made friends with them..

made an awesome guild.. called Pizza Pants.. plz join LOL

but yeah so he left..
so it was me and roko and gluttony
gluttony was running around screaming "BABY RAPE!" cuz he was a baby and like "raping me" LOL

then he left.. and me and roko talked for a REALLY long time like 2 hours.. he showed me his favorite shops..
i had to ask him.. if he was a guy.. lol he said yes.. he acts so much like a girl!!

but i got his YIM name.. (Seth_2010) he is Sooooo cool.. we have a lot on common!

he:
-likes anime
-likes video games
-Loves graffiti kingdom
-dispises rap and country music
-LOVES mountain dew pitch black II
-uses a lot of smilies like ^_^ and =OO!!! and stuff
-is TOTALLY RANDOM! XD

in my guild he said he wanetd to be the vibrating sheep.. OF DEATH! XD so he is.



ugh. cant remember anymore XD

but he is awesome..

<3 <3.. and i hope to talk to him more soon ^^
(he had to go XD)

Today.

May. 2nd, 2007 12:06 am
caitaro: (Default)
Today it thundered all day...

and i got up at noon.. (which is a miracle!!!!!!)

i played RO a bit...

im like level 240-some..

and i have over 70million zeny lol..

Then i did math.. exam #5 is tomarrow >.< i actually KNOW the material this time.. however.... I need my notes sometimes ;-;


so i might do bad..


anyway right now im averaging a 83% in there..

and tomarrow is the last exam WOO

but then next monday is the final exam ;-; o no..

im POSITIVE im gunna do bad on that, lol..

but then IM DONE WITH SK00L

ooo yeeeeeaaahhh baby >:3333333


Tomarrows last day for indesign!!! ^_^^_^_^^_^_^^_^_^__^^_^^^^^

that class was fun..

i didnt read any of the book though O.O

and during class all i did was go on internet >.<..

yet im gettin a 4.0 :OOO

im such a ch34ter!

Ok then we had supper.. which was brats on the grill and M + C yummmm.

Thennnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.. cory played RO.. and then we went to go get ice cream.. i got a hot fudge sunday from the udder side (i didnt go in of course O_O)

it was good..

and then i played mother.. AKA Earthbound 0.. for.. o.o;; about 4 hours XD... and im only level 10 o.o;; but i got the first 3 songs.. and i havent died yet!!

so thats good...

now im gunna get a shower.. and then... f00d and then.. o.o oh shyt.. i have been neglecting my gigapets all day >.< they're prolly dead.

*checks*

My hamster has 0% everything and has cooties >.< and my other thing.. infact is dead ;-;

*resets other thing*

what shall i make... hmm

i make bunny :o

hopefully ill remember them tomarrow >.<

This is the first time ive forgot.. >,<<<<<<


ugh i hate memory losss

ughh

Apr. 25th, 2007 05:39 am
caitaro: (Default)
Well..


i stopped playing RO at 2..

went in my room and read my book till i finished at 4:30.. (twas called the boy who reversed himself by william sleator and it was really /really/ good)
stared atmy fish and petted whiteface till 5:30.. dad left for work.. and here i am.


Math test... and indesign final exam today.... and me with 0 hrs of sleep XDD!!!


All i can say is.. This will be interesting. lol.




BUt yeah...... my coughing is horrendous now.. when i breathe, i feel like i have to puke..


and if theres ANY smell whatsover around my nose, i spit up stomache acid... or perhaps even a little more.



my lungs are tired... and so is my back from being soo... stressed upon.. ;-;

i wish i wouldnt cough any more.


*plays RO*


sadly, i am addicted *sob*

*goes to ROanonymous.com*
caitaro: (Default)
Yes, yet again i am hopelessly addicted to RO :( lol.

im not too good at it... i think.
caitaro: (Default)
Shanes over and we're installing RO XD.
its gunna be so much fun.
caitaro: (Default)
So.. Ill be playing RO for awhile....

I'm a Gypsey..

which is fun..

i have a whip :O...

*cough* bondage *cough*

LOL JK but yeah..

Corys been playing RO a lot too..

he's a manatee =(
caitaro: (Default)
Woo so i reformatted.. Fixed my monitor.. and i have no programs on my computer whatsoever except RO!! XD WOO!!

so.. Im updating via the web.. and this is the first time EVER that ive done that XD

so pizza

but if you wish to join me at RO..

http://subwaytovenus.free.fr/eng/dl.html

Feel free..

My name is Caiterz.

Shane + Travis have various names so i duno o_O lol..

*yawns* Im level like.. 76.. and i played it for 20 mins. XD..

Um.. so ill try to get semagic DL'd tomarrow... so i can backdate a bit..

Um... I want sp00ny to come over at the end of the month BUt he wants me to come over.. but my dad wont let me cuz hes afraid im going to get raped...

So i duno..
I guess if he cant come over thats ok.. Ill play RO and sort CDs.. and sleep..

Oh god sleep..

YES..

*orgasms over the thought of sleeping*

LOL.. ok not that far but man i <3 sleeping..

... ... and people playing with my hair ....

*drool*

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