caitaro: (Default)
PRAISE JESUS SOME MOER.

1 hour ago
Cait: and ew @ Soki doing cpr o_O. go get cochma or tenter plx
1 hour ago
Cait: Home from work now D;
4 hours ago
Seal: Soki, go do CPR to cait. XDDD Glad to see you back Sala (or at elast get news from you) :O
11 hours ago
Cait: OM GOMGO MGOMG OGMOMG OMGOMGOMG THE IP CHECKS, IT REALLY IS HIS, OMGOT(#Q%*#( *%# #*%Y(#% #$( *dies about 4 billion times* T_T
12 hours ago
Cait: omg *cries* then *Does IP check* T_T
12 hours ago
Arlans: OMG SALAM or somone tricky us?
13 hours ago
Salamix: I'll try and come back onto this thing later too when I can.
13 hours ago
Salamix: Ugh, not looking forward to this. Everyone, don't know if I'll be back. Been awhile doing my online games now. Cait, I'll send you and email within a few days.



^ thats teh only thing i have from him

But i know hes alive.

*Is happy*



..*Doesnt know if she should be pised or happy hes back in general though*

reading...

Jan. 23rd, 2010 01:54 am
caitaro: (Default)
http://www.amazon.com/Everafter-Amy-Huntley/dp/0061776793

The everafter... by amy huntley

Book i discovered at the library in the town i work in..
(never been in there before this)

(so many good books there)


anyway gthis book was about a teen who died and she flashbacks to her memories as a dead spirit

and honestly, this is the best explanation of a possible afterlife than any other ive seen before

IE: LOLHEAVEN
or
LOLBURNINGHELLZLOLOLOL

But yeah

Her and her BF Gabe..

romance story

aww..,.......................

but now i am sad.

*points to dried tears on her cheeks*

Because it reminds me of salam.

and i told myself, after yesterday, im done with him, he's gone.


But it's not working so well.

I miss him so much

and im very fatigued due to worry and lack of sleep from worrying..

i miss him...

and

i wonder if he ever shows up in irc, what i would say to him

what he would say to me.........

I wonder how long im guna have to wait.. for that to happen...

weeks? months?


plx whiteface.. bring him back to me ;-;



But another though has crossed my mind

if he does come back

depending on how long it takes


will everything be the same?

will it be worse?

Will he still consider me his gf?

will he still love me?



at this point i dont care, i just wanna know hes safe :|
caitaro: (Default)
[02:12] <Salamix> I hope not to vanish. Ever.
[02:12] <Cait> well, i hope so too
[02:12] <Cait> but it -always- happens x3

[02:15] <Salamix> Eh, I've actually had one morbid thought about that
[02:15] <Cait> ohh?
[02:15] <Cait> share?
[02:15] <Salamix> if I died, how would you know?
[02:16] <Cait> if you never signed on again, i suppose..
</td></tr><tr style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #e0edff"><td>[02:16] <Cait> some places online have obituary things
[02:16] <Cait> mostly the ones ive found were for adults, i dont know too many teens that have died :P
[02:17] <Salamix> Because it doesn't happen much
[02:17] <Cait> but that thought has crossed my mind a ton not just with you but with a lot of other people
</td></tr><tr style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #e0edff"><td>[02:17] <Cait> Like my friend Oxy, my other friend danny.. and Maxxy
[02:17] <Cait> they all vanished
[02:17] <Cait> i always wonder...
</td></tr><tr style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #e0edff"><td></td></tr><tr style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #e0edff"><td></td></tr>

[07:40] <BJ>&lt;=/
[07:40] <BJ>Salam
[07:40] <BJ>please dont leave me &lt;=|
[07:40] <SALAMIX>I won't
[07:40] <BJ>*hugs*
[07:40] <BJ>i duno what id do without you



-------------

2 words.


IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRONYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY


:|
caitaro: (Default)
I dont care to go to work
or log on trickster


I didnt go to school yesterday...

I was colder than hell, and shaking bad at the comp, so i took a shower...

Kitten wanted in as usual, but i kept her out. not in the mood for her..

So then she sat outside and cried for the whole 45 mins i was in there..

i got out, and

and the one time kitten was loving on me, i pushed her out of my room, i didnt want her in here when im in this sort of mood...

she squeezed under the door anyway. -.-



got on trickster for the patch..

got to meet Kumiho.. raveny was there too.

but i didnt stay long..

didnt feel like it.

came in here to write this, and talked to fuzee a bit...

*sigh*

Tomarrow/today is the last day of my mini vacation..

Told myself im done w/ salam now if he doesnt contact me by then..

*sigh*...

but

i miss him so much...

and i know im feeling this sucky because i miss him. Even though he is nothing like what i was in a person, i miss him so much... :/

phoenixy had a point though...

Its a new year.. no point dwelling in the past. look forward not back.

I've got a lot going for me..

Im still alive.. I have my guild and guildies...

I have a JOB. IN MICHIGAN.

But it all seems rather pointless when i dont have someone i can ramble on about everything too...

Someone i feel strongly about, and just wanna be with them... and... ugh. Salam please come back to me ;-;

I know im just being whiney and emo.. but ill try not to think about him or mention him ever again after today.. Ill try..


But so you know, i go to bed, and most nights stare off at the wall with watery eyes wondering what happened to him... what hes doing - if anything - right now.. If he misses me.. wondering why he hasnt contacted me....

Wonder how long that'll go on for..

But bleh, this is how i felt when sp00ny and i were done. and i felt the "NEVAR DO RELATIONSHIPS AGAIN" thing.. and when i was just by myself and not depending on anyone else, it was great, and id never feel like this.. and never feel like i had to have somoene to be happy.

Sigh.


wish they didnt fire me if i didnt go to work, id stay in bed all day.. v-v

----



all emoness aside (and by aside i mean still thinking aboout but duno what to write about)'

I made my turkey today

Hes very turkey tastic

I stil have to sew 1 wing of his on though o_O

Then i have a pumpkin as well

and my 2 skirts....

Duno if ill do that tomarrow

or get ont rickster

..Sigh


Oh yeah while i was cutting out the pieces for my turkey, i watched "the day the earth stood still" and it was an alright movie.

Better than most ive seen lately.


Fuzee is telling me to go to bed
and hes prolly right

I Like fuzee a lot


Too bad hes jailbait
sigh
caitaro: (Default)
I mailed his letter today though

So im nervous
if he calls me ill be so shy
if he mails me, I dunooo
aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

*sob*

Jan. 5th, 2010 07:44 am
caitaro: (Default)
Im so depressed over salam missing..

Im gunna send him a letter irl..


Heres what i got


Salam,

Hey!

It's been a few weeks since you've been on, and we're (me, dino, the guild) wondering where you went. Generally you'd tell us when you'd be gone for football or whatnot.

I'm pretty worried that something bad may have happened. You know me, I'm sure you expected that's what I've been thinking.

I know there's a chance that you'd rather not recieve anything from me at all, and I'm sorry if this is weird, but I'm really worried. I doubt you'd just vanish off the face of the earth for no reason. (You said you wouldn't!)

Some people have said you may be gone for the holidays, or just busy IRL, or want to take a break from Trickster - but leave without saying anything at all to anyone? Very unlike you... Plus you said we could do something together on 1 of my 4 days off in a row, those are all gone now, and you weren't on still...


So if you could, please let me know what's going on - and I can let everyone else know too. My Address = _____ and Phone # = ______. Feel free to write or call - anytime - okay? (Obviously I wont be available when I'm at work though, heh - but if you give my bro/dad/answering machine your # I -CAN- call you back :3)

Hope to hear from you asap! <3


PS - From our guild members...

*Insert image here*



-----

In case someone in Salam's family opens this...

Hi, I'm Cait, leader of the guild Firefly on a computer game, Trickster Online. Salam is co-owner of my guild, and a very dear friend of mine. I was one of the group members in which he won the contest to get his ipod! Anyway, He hasn't been online ingame since December 6th, and hasnt been in contact with me since before christmas, and he hasn't told any of us he was leaving, and we are worried about him.

If you could, please give him this letter if possible. If not, if one of you could contact me about his situation, we would appreciate it greatly.

Sincerely,


*cool siggy*


Cait
Firefly Guild Master





ugh, though.

The other day i was sitting and wondering..

"What if hes not even real?"

What if my subconscious made him up, i mean he DID have the personality of a board, lol (His words not mine XD)

but too many other people know him....



...In the meantime, im trying to forget he exists..


(im failing hard)


I think im seriously pissing some people off w/ my salam whining, so i better cool it.

BUT NOT HERE

YOU LUCKY DENIZENS OF CAITS JOURNAL (why are you still here ya nubs? XD)

GET TO HEAR ABOUT IT

till i actually forget him <=/



bleh, i dont feel like going to work ever again, but i have to cuz i duno how to call in, and im too lazy to not go and stuff.
XD
caitaro: (Default)
...and i found a phone number that matches salams address and last name.


...But im too afraid to call it...


..but im worrying about him so much ive got nothing done all 4 days im off (well i redid my room, but that dun count so much)


I looked up local obituaries for his town, hes not in there (thank whiteface)

Cant find any hospitalizations..


..i did find someone in his mobile home park got arrested for drugs.. but thats it (it wasnt him)





I miss you salam, wherever you are...
caitaro: (Default)
;_;

been runnin to the bathroom a ton today...

my stomache is in painnn
..

I think its mostly nerves..

and i came across a depressing thought.


all along i beenthinking "when salam gets back on...."


Well...


...What if i never see him again?


*eyes fill up with tears*


*goes to bed*
caitaro: (Default)
and emailed salam

he still hasnt been online since the 22nd.



If i dont get a reply..

and he doesnt sign on still..


I duno what im gunna do..

*Cries for 98 minutes* ;-;

<3

Dec. 10th, 2009 12:32 am
caitaro: (Default)
I love carol.

So much.

so very much.


[02:29] 12/2/2009 2:29:40 AM Gag: well i need togo finish my hair
[02:29] 12/2/2009 2:29:49 AM caiterz@gmail.com: Ok
[02:29] 12/2/2009 2:29:56 AM caiterz@gmail.com: Cyas carol~~
[02:29] 12/2/2009 2:30:19 AM Gag: ok see ya love u


and she loves me too.


and i wanna tell her


><

so bad

but.

no guts...

and salam wont share his.


[00:21] <~Cait> i has very few guts D;
[00:22] <@Salamix> So buy more?
[00:22] <~Cait> XD!!!!!!!!!!!
[00:22] <@Salamix> I'm sure there's a black market dealer for you somewhere
[00:22] <~Cait> or FORCE THEM TO REPRODUCE!??
[00:22] <~Cait> XD
[00:22] <~Cait> FORCEEEEEEEEE
[00:22] <~Cait> salam
[00:22] <~Cait> will you sell me some of your guts D:
[00:23] <@Salamix> no
[00:23] =(
[00:23] why
[00:24] <@Salamix> because
[00:24] because what!??
[00:24] Salam youre never afraid of anything, and youre honest, and fearless and amazing
[00:24] surely you have some extras to sell :o
[00:25] <@Salamix> Lies.
[00:27] <~Cait> o_o
[00:27] <~Cait> how is that lies?
[00:27] * TheCait (caiterz@scave-BB0B18C6.dialinfree.com) Quit (Ping timeout)
[00:27] <@Salamix> My guts are mine
[00:27] <~Cait> XD
[00:27] <~Cait> no sharing?
[00:27] <~Cait> ;(
[00:28] <~Cait> well i could follow your advice..
[00:28] <~Cait> *Sharpens kiwi knife*
[00:28] <~Cait> and force some out of you
[00:28] <~Cait> sound good? o.o
[00:30] <@Salamix> Yeah, but you don't have the guts
[00:30] <~Cait> XD
[00:30] <~Cait> salam
[00:30] <~Cait> id be a lot easier for me to come at you with a knife
[00:30] <~Cait> than it would for me to contront someone verbally.
[00:30] <~Cait> o.o
[00:30] <~Cait> *confront







Oh carol~

maybe i can tell you...

maybe i can tell her, if i paint her something for xmas

and put

"I love you too" at the bottom.
:O
caitaro: (Default)

[02:35] <~cait> nothing more would please me than to go around all day doing things for you that make you happy..
[02:35] <~cait> it would be the best <3...
[02:36] <~cait> id like to do it even here!! But theres not too terribly much i can do for you online <=/
[02:37] <@Salamix> Spin.
[02:37] <~cait> o.o
[02:37] * ~cait spins
[02:39] <@Salamix> Eh, I just wanted to say spin.
[02:39] <~cait> lol
[02:40] <~cait> suuure
[02:40] <~cait> hehehe
[02:42] <@Salamix> Yeah, that's right
[02:42] <~cait> heh ^^
[03:52] <~Caiteka> doesnt feel so cold out here anymore...
[03:53] <~Caiteka> and my eyes feel so heavy but i cant sleep. blarg. XD
[03:56] <@Salamix> lol
[03:58] <@Salamix> http://media.ebaumsworld.com/2008/08/885612/Sharkattacks.jpg
* Retrieving #memoirs modes...
[03:58] <~Caiteka> click.
[03:59] <@Salamix> http://www.marcofolio.net/images/stories/fun/imagedump/demotivational_posters/elephants.jpg
[03:59] <~Caiteka> rofl
[03:59] <~Caiteka> click
[03:59] <@Salamix> http://www.marcofolio.net/images/stories/fun/imagedump/demotivational_posters/elephants.jpg
[03:59] <~Caiteka> rofl
[03:59] <~Caiteka> click
[03:59] <@Salamix> http://www.marcofolio.net/images/stories/fun/imagedump/demotivational_posters/powerleveling.jpg
[03:59] <~Caiteka> the shark attack
[03:59] <~Caiteka> pic
[03:59] <~Caiteka> if i didnt know that was impossible
[03:59] <~Caiteka> that would be hard to tell if it was photoshopped or not
[03:59] <~Caiteka> because the quality is so bad.
[04:00] <@Salamix> http://jj.am/gallery/d/45092-1/40LB_Rape_box.jpg
[04:00] <~Caiteka> ive seen the elephant one before
[04:01] <@Salamix> http://lolism.co.uk/pix/what_they_believe01.gif
[04:02] <~Caiteka> for some reason, net is going -really- slow right now.
[04:02] <@Salamix> http://media.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/9/80514298.jpg
[04:03] <@Salamix> http://memeparty.com/i/m/b341ba50c07d50099998741813b9ac5c.jpg
[04:03] <@Salamix> http://demotivateyou.com/wp-content/gallery/demotivational-poster-gallery-1/82104_1208668095446_122_531lo.jpg
[04:03] <@Salamix> http://demotivateyou.com/wp-content/gallery/demotivational-poster-gallery-1/beer.jpg
[04:04] <~Caiteka> lol box of rape
[04:04] <~Caiteka> do not challenge the gate XD
[04:06] <~Caiteka> o_o @ 30% of women  [At this point im like.. wth, remind me to never marry him]
[04:06] <@Salamix> http://unrealitymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/demotivational_poster_8.jpg
[04:06] <@Salamix> http://imgur.com/F0MOo.jpg
[04:07] <~Caiteka> beer o.o
[04:08] <@Salamix> http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/0906/last-wishes-funny-humor-jackson-michael-demotivational-poster-1246232514.jpg
[04:08] <@Salamix> http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/0906/last-wishes-funny-humor-jackson-michael-demotivational-poster-1246232514.jpg
[04:08] <@Salamix> http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/0906/even-if-you-are-pro-life-demotivational-poster-1245250505.png
[04:10] <~Caiteka> ROFL YAHOO ANSWERS
[04:10] <@Salamix> http://lh6.ggpht.com/joelrgross/SK2L4rmGJ6I/AAAAAAAACFs/wdGZhbYBkys/pic14458.jpg
[04:10] <@Salamix> http://lh6.ggpht.com/joelrgross/SK2L4rmGJ6I/AAAAAAAACFs/wdGZhbYBkys/pic14458.jpg
[04:11] <~Caiteka> ROFL PDF
[04:11] <~Caiteka> ROFL PDF
[04:11] <@Salamix> http://www.starzaki.eu.org/~littlemaggot/blog/0.0_2F44/1214929563270_thumb.jpg
[04:12] <~Caiteka> lol
[04:12] <~Caiteka> DONKEY PUNCH


[04:13] <@Salamix> http://www.animated-glitter-graphics.com/images/funny-motivationa-posters.jpg
[04:14] <@Salamix> http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_4s5pmFL_ZlQ/SHdpy5jUSXI/AAAAAAAAA_o/9X1XZTKO_Ns/s320/ninjas+karate+lessons+kidnapped++bum+hobo+panhandler+motivational+poster+posters+inspirational+funny+demotivational+hot++humorous++www.motivationalpostersonline.blogspot.com.jpg
[04:15] <@Salamix> http://photos-a.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs091.snc3/15833_1247275016208_1059410460_793181_4058121_n.jpg
[04:15] <~Caiteka> ive seen the blasphemy one
[04:15] <~Caiteka> before
[04:15] <~Caiteka> o_0 @ domestic violence
[04:15] <~Caiteka> remind me
[04:15] <~Caiteka> to never
[04:15] <~Caiteka> ever
[04:15] <~Caiteka> marry you
[04:15] <~Caiteka> Lmao
[04:15] <~Caiteka> XD
[04:15] * ~Caiteka = scared
[04:15] <~Caiteka> XD
[04:16] <@Salamix> http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v260/occeismyhero/1184451944704.jpg
[04:16] <@Salamix> why not?
[04:16] <~Caiteka> you might wanna beat me
[04:16] <~Caiteka> D:
[04:16] <~Caiteka> lol
[04:16] <~Caiteka> or make me carry beer?
[04:16] <~Caiteka> XD
caitaro: (Default)
So I had a dream that...

I called salam on the phone...



...and he sounded very young.

with a hint of southern accent.


and it was odd because he was not shy or untalkative on the phone at all, he was pretty hyper and stuff.

so i was like.. cool!


anyway im at work, and someone comes up to me and is like. "sup"
and im like "hi can i help you?"

they said "...its salam"

and jaw drops about 9 ft...

so im all "...s...salam!! O_O"

and so we hang out a ton around the hunting equips for some reason...

and i dont remember too well anymore..

but i was working really long hours

and he kept saying some really witty things and i was
just

impressed

so i went up to him and *HUG*

XD

and i found out im pronouncing his name RIGHT...

(even though IRL im not supposidly)



and i duno, i ended up hugging him twice,

and it felt so good

ooooohohhohohooo
hehe



then i duno i was taking a bath, and salam turned into this blue piece of plastic.. and he kept trying to find bugs to battle underwater

and it was odd.

Yep.
caitaro: (Default)
[22:48] <Salamix> Anyways, up for some flyff?
[22:49] <&Cait> well.
[22:49] <&Cait> im lagging my ass off
[22:49] <&Cait> so im trying to find the source of the ticking
[22:49] <&Cait> hopefully its not a  pipe bomb.
[22:49] <Salamix> TIME BOMB
[22:49] <&Cait> Then
[22:49] <&Cait> i have to take this pic
[22:49] <&Cait> for the costume thing
[22:49] <Salamix> oh, alright
[22:49] <&Cait> so i gotta color my hair black real quick and do that
[22:49] <&Cait> Then
[22:50] <&Cait> i can
[22:50] <&Cait> ok
[22:50] <&Cait> ?
[22:50] <&Cait> :3
[22:50] <Salamix> NO
[22:50] <Salamix> Alright
[22:50] <&Cait> ROFL
[22:50] <&Cait> NO ITS NOT OK
[22:50] <Salamix> also, good job to dino, he got me playing hacks again
[22:50] <&Cait> "I DEMAND YOU PLAY WITH ME NOW"
[22:50] <&Cait> you know i would
[22:50] <Salamix> So...I'll be doing that while you do stuff
[22:51] <&Cait> ok
[22:51] <&Cait> what lv are you?
[22:51] <Salamix> 50ish
[22:51] <&Cait> ok then.
[23:15] <&Cait> OK pix taken
[23:15] <&Cait> now i gotta find one thats good
[23:16] <&Cait> photoshop my gloves and socks green, then upload!
[23:20] <Salamix> Always with the photoshop!
[23:20] <&Cait> Photoshop is my life!
[23:20] <&Cait> ....besides you and trickster
[23:20] <&Cait> >_>
[23:20] <&Cait> <_<
[23:20] <&Cait> >_>
[23:20] <&Cait> :3
[23:27] <&Cait> and man
[23:27] <&Cait> coloring my hair black didnt work so well
[23:27] <&Cait> cuz  my brother is retarded.
[23:30] <&Cait> OMFG
[23:30] <&Cait> ima kill hyochan XD
[23:31] <Salamix> why
[23:31] <&Cait> ill show you
[23:33] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/dyf59ykyiuq1etjh3iu2.jpg
[23:34] <Salamix> oh
[23:34] <&Cait> :O
[23:34] <&Cait> salamm
[23:34] <&Cait> dun dump me for aria
[23:34] <&Cait> ;-;
[23:34] <&Cait> XD
[23:43] <&Cait> Man this is a really crappy photoshop job. oh well.
[23:53] <Salamix> How crappy?
[23:53] <&Cait> Really crappy
[23:53] <&Cait> ill show you in a few
[23:54] <&Cait> is your sis coming home tonight?
[23:55] <Salamix> Soonish maybe?
[23:55] <&Cait> Ok
[23:55] <Salamix> I have NO idea
[23:56] <&Cait> alright
[23:56] <&Cait> almost done uploading
[23:57] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/6q8th06jxgtxrsuifrsb.jpg
[23:57] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/5vc4w8twjpurhtpywem7.jpg
[23:57] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/gndht8lzxjpzg29jysty.jpg
[23:57] <&Cait> K there
[23:59] <&Cait> man, my face looks really greasy from work x_x.
[23:59] <&Cait> o wel.
[23:59] <Salamix> Those gloves are pretty green
[23:59] <&Cait> Theyre red irl
Session Time: Sun Nov 01 00:00:00 2009
[00:01] <&Cait> O CRAP
[00:01] <&Cait> i didnt even have my bunny ears on
[00:01] <&Cait> UGH
[00:01] <Salamix> lol
[00:02] <&Cait> well.
[00:02] <&Cait> i guess i can photoshop them in.
[00:02] <Salamix> I didn't even notice
[00:02] <&Cait> v_v
[00:03] <Salamix> Why not just redo the pics?
[00:03] <&Cait> because
[00:03] <&Cait> i had to bribe my brother to do these ones
[00:03] <&Cait> and like HELL ima redo those gloves + socks
[00:04] <&Cait> LOL
[00:04] <&Cait> you can see what a crappy job my bro did
[00:04] <&Cait> on my hair
[00:04] <&Cait> in the ear pix
[00:08] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/6f9yxp1dl2g739b7nhbw.jpg
[00:08] <&Cait> loLoLoLol
[00:09] <Salamix> Oh, wow
[00:09] <Salamix> So brown still
[00:09] <&Cait> Yeah
[00:09] <&Cait> see my brother fails at life.
[00:09] <&Cait> he used 1/2 a can too
[00:09] <&Cait> lol
[00:14] <&Cait> Ok, ears photoshopped on/
[00:15] <&Cait> a nd holy crap
[00:15] <&Cait> http://forum.ntreev.net/trickster/cfs-filesystemfile.ashx/__key/CommunityServer.Components.ImageFileViewer/CommunityServer.Discussions.Components.Files.8/0027.wtl4.jpg_2D00_550x0.jpg
[00:15] <&Cait> noir pix
[00:15] <&Cait> she didnt even tell us she had pix up.
[00:16] <Salamix> She's trying to mess with you!
[00:16] <Salamix> OOOOOOO
[00:16] <&Cait> lol
[00:16] <&Cait> i think mainly cuz
[00:17] <&Cait> everyone still think she a guy
[00:17] <&Cait> shes like
[00:17] <&Cait> "CAIT DONT TELL ANYONE IM A GIRL ><"
[00:17] <&Cait> so im like "uh, alright"
[00:17] <&Cait> well irl pix proove shes a girl now.
[00:19] <Salamix> Or do they!?
[00:19] <&Cait> yea, pretty much i'd say o.o
[00:23] <&Cait> Ok salamz
[00:23] <&Cait> check it
[00:23] <&Cait> my photoshopped earz
[00:23] <&Cait> http://forum.ntreev.net/trickster/forums/p/55363/358872.aspx#358872
[00:24] <&Cait> oy o///////o
[00:24] <&Cait> 3d says im cute
[00:24] <&Cait> XD
[00:25] <Salamix> It's adorable. The band thing kind of disappears though.
[00:25] <&Cait> D:?
[00:25] <&Cait> Yeah
[00:25] <&Cait> its like that though
[00:25] <&Cait> but omgz/
[00:25] <&Cait> o/////////////////////////////////////////////o salamz D:!
[00:26] <Salamix> wat?
[00:26] <&Cait> itz adorable?
[00:26] <&Cait> D:
[00:26] <Salamix> K fine. Be like that.
[00:26] <&Cait> No,
[00:26] <&Cait> its just
[00:27] <&Cait> you never said anything like that before
[00:27] <&Cait> *years*
[00:27] <&Cait> *tears*
[00:27] <Salamix> YEARS
[00:27] <&Cait> nu
[00:27] <&Cait> omg
[00:27] <&Cait> but yeshh
[00:27] <&Cait> sallammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm <3
[00:27] <&Cait> you are so awesomeee XD
[00:27] <Salamix> meh. I'm ok.
[00:27] <&Cait> no
[00:28] <&Cait> you rawk
[00:28] <&Cait> ^_^
[00:28] <&Cait> *huggles for 47hrs*
[00:29] <&Cait> Ill show you
[00:29] <&Cait> the pix i took the ears from XD
[00:31] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/4qrpu068se7bf0vfqbh.jpg
[00:31] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/7abnw18dfx382ddgxq8e.jpg
[00:31] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/2iw4ijonbimwwn7nnldr.jpg
[00:38] <&Cait> http://photoanon.com/images/ol0yk63yk5bvwnmfz2dp.jpg



AND HE SAYS IM ADORABLE

HOLY JESUS ON A STICK
caitaro: (Default)
[02:05] <~Cait> I thought of something
[02:06] <~Cait> *EVIL GRIN*
[02:06] <~Cait> >:3333333333333
[02:06] <@Salamix> wat
[02:06] <~Cait> hehehee
[02:06] <~Cait> I'll give you~
[02:07] <~Cait> 2 more cat boxes
[02:07] <~Cait> and some WAFFLE FRIES
[02:07] <~Cait> FO FREE
[02:07] <~Cait> -IF-
[02:07] <~Cait> i get salam pix - PF
[02:07] <~Cait> :3333333333333333333
[02:07] <~Cait> BRIBERY
[02:07] <~Cait> LOL
[02:07] <@Salamix> Oh
[02:07] <~Cait> otherwise you gotta buy em
[02:07] <~Cait> >:3./
[02:07] <~Cait> if you want any, anyway
[02:08] <~Cait> :o
[02:08] <@Salamix> alright
[02:08] <@Salamix> Know anyone buying odinea parts then?


*dies*

I WANT SALAM PIXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX *Cry*

Salam <3

Oct. 6th, 2009 06:32 am
caitaro: (Default)

Had a nice chat with salam

about us.


[04:00] <Salamix> He's concerned Naga's trying to break us up.
[04:00] <Cait> o.o'
[04:00] <Cait> o___o''''
[04:00] <Cait> er, is that what you think shes trying to do too?
[04:01] <Salamix> Well, personally, yeah. What have I done?
[04:01] <Cait> >_<!
[04:01] <Cait> WHY is she trying that?
[04:02] <Salamix> That was my question
[04:02] <Salamix> Also, Cait, I do love you. I'm not so great at showing it or anything, but it's sincere.
[04:03] <Cait> :x!!!
[04:03] <Cait> Salam..
[04:03] <Cait> <33
[04:03] <Cait> I do believe you!
[04:03] <Cait> I never did,
[04:03] <Cait> *I never did doubt you
[04:03] <Salamix> I know
[04:04] <Cait> Maybe nagami thinks that cuz you dont, er, for lack of better words, love on me back
[04:04] <Cait> that you dont ACTUALLY... love me.
[04:04] <Cait> :x
[04:06] <Salamix> http://embed.mibbit.com/pb/qLyu2k
[04:06] <Cait> o.o
[04:06] <Cait> click
[04:06] <Salamix> That's the convo
[04:07] <Cait> :x ohs
[04:09] <Cait> "Nagami is queen of all relationships, or so she says. " lmao
[04:10] <Cait> but yeah, er.
[04:10] <Cait>  i didnt think she was trying to break us apart..
[04:10] <Salamix> It didn't hit me until he said it
[04:10] <Cait> I duno why I think she knows better than i do about this stuff
[04:10] <Cait> ><
[04:11] <Cait> shes more experienced, i guess i just take everything what she says as truth..
[04:11] <Salamix> It not might even be the case, she just might be generally bad at this.
[04:11] <Cait> She tells me
[04:11] <Cait> "Salam hasnt ever had a gf besides you, and you NEED TO force him to do things with you, cuz if he doesnt then he dOESNT CARE ABOUT YOU"
[04:12] <Cait> and whatever
[04:12] <Cait> >_<
[04:12] <Cait> Or that you dont know how, or are embarrased or whatever.
[04:12] <Cait> and as i said in that screenie :x
[04:12] <Salamix> Yes I have! Just not exactly recently or very well.
[04:12] <Cait> that
[04:12] <Cait> you show you care in your own way
[04:13] <Cait> which may not be the same way that she or i am used to...
[04:14] <Cait> and i respect that
[04:14] <Cait> thats why i didnt talk to you about it
[04:14] <Cait> cuz i figured thats what the case was :x
[04:15] <Salamix> I know.
[04:16] <Salamix> Just, he said you asked him about the screenshot, I'm always around to ask too!
[04:16] <Cait> plus im still pretty shy about this whole thing too ><
[04:16] <Cait> I know you say not too
[04:16] <Salamix> Yeah, I know
[04:16] <Cait> but also, you've been angry at odinea
[04:16] <Cait> and im
[04:16] <Cait> SUPAR afraid to talk to angry salam about... anything XD much less this kinda stuff :x
[04:17] <Salamix> Odinea's not going to make me explode at the world
[04:17] <Cait> XD
[04:17] <Cait> i dont know that though!
[04:17] <Cait> I havent seen too much of angreh salam :X!
[04:17] <Cait> some people, when angry at anything, ARE angry at the world
[04:18] <Salamix> My anger at odinea is just at odinea
[04:18] <Cait> And i dun want you to be mad at me, or yell at me or something, cuz that would be the worst thing ever ><
[04:18] <Salamix> It's pointless to get angry at everything else
[04:19] <Cait> :3!!!!
[04:19] <Cait> im so glad you think that way...
[04:19] <Cait> too many people i've met get angry at everything when angry XD
[04:19] <Cait> Really, i should have known
[04:20] <Cait> that
[04:20] <Cait> you wouldnt have that fault
[04:21] <Cait> no matter what consistancies i see in people
[04:21] <Cait> aspects i hate in people
[04:21] <Cait> you NEVER have them
[04:21] <Salamix> Or never in excess at least
[04:22] <Cait> I duno
[04:22] <Cait> i never saw anything about you i didnt like...
[04:22] <Cait> always good things i never see in others
[04:22] <Cait> omggggggg you're too awesomeeeee ;-; XD
[04:22] <Salamix> Hah, it's kind of comical though.
[04:22] <Cait> why??
[04:23] <Salamix> We're both so different with our likes and stuff, but we match morally so well
[04:23] <Cait> I KNOW
[04:23] <Cait> when i was writing that speech thats one thing i thought about
[04:23] <Cait> but thats 1 thing that nagami says thats true then,
[04:24] <Salamix> what?
[04:24] <Cait> she says "even though you 2 like different stuff, your personalities match and compliment eachother, thats why you 2 click so well"
[04:24] <Cait> :x
[04:26] <Salamix> Oh
[04:26] <Cait> so  i duno
[04:26] <Cait> when to listen to her
[04:27] <Cait> when to not
[04:27] <Cait> maybe i should just, not talk to her at all.
[04:27] <Cait> cuz she puts bad ideas in my head ><
[04:27] <Salamix> I don't know, that might not be right. You guys get along, right? Just take things with a grain of salt
[04:28] <Cait> sometimes she pisses me off
[04:28] <Cait> in those screenies
[04:28] <Cait> i was fuming
[04:28] <Cait> But other times
[04:28] <Cait> mostly with its us 3 talking
[04:28] <Cait> about pervy things, LOL
[04:28] <Cait> shes so funny!
[04:28] <Cait> and stuff.
[04:32] <Salamix> yeah
[04:32] <Cait> but then she PMs me and tells me to... do pervy things to you, because that would definately catch your interest... and im like Ohhhh jebusss nuuu wayyy not yet sooooooooo embarrassing NUU ;x
[04:32] <Cait> lol
[04:33] <Salamix> To be honest, it wouldn't really
[04:33] <Salamix> Text based pervy things?
[04:33] <Cait> XD
[04:33] <Cait> not exactly like thers many others!!
[04:33] <Cait> besides like camming
[04:34] <Cait> and thats a DEFIANTE NO EFFING WAY
[04:34] <Cait> XD
[04:35] <Salamix> Hah, yeah.
[04:36] <Cait> but
[04:36] <Cait> either way
[04:36] <Cait> You wouldnt like text pervy things?
[04:36] <Cait> just cuz its not real?
[04:38] <Salamix> More that it's just not exactly exciting
[04:38] <Cait> hrm
[04:38] <Cait> http://people.ambrosiasw.com/~andrew/funny/bloodcyber.html
[04:38] <Cait> so stuff like that doesnt just
[04:39] <Cait> make you feel different things?
[04:39] <Salamix> Like, what kind of pervy?
[04:39] <Cait> LOLLLLLLLLLLL
[04:39] <Salamix> Uh, it did.
[04:39] <Salamix> Laughter.
[04:39] <Cait> ROFLMAO
[04:39] <Salamix> Holy crap. Pause!
[04:39] <Cait> ?
[04:41] <Salamix> Oh man, THAT is great.
[04:41] <Cait> I KNOW! XDDDDDDDD
[04:41] <Salamix> And I've only read two,.
[04:42] <Cait> i cant believe youve never seen this yet??
[04:43] <Salamix> Bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
[04:43] <Cait> The britneyspears ones is flippin lmfaoooooooo-tastic
[04:43] <Salamix> NO!
[04:43] <Cait> XDDDd
[04:44] <Salamix> OMG, The rhino one!
[04:44] <Cait> I KNOW!!!!!!!! XDDD
[04:44] <Salamix> I couldn't breathe for a second
[04:44] <Cait> XDDD
[04:44] <Salamix> Holy crap
[04:44] <Cait> Oh poor salam!!
[04:44] <Cait> I cant believe you havent seen this yet!
[04:44] <Cait> This is seriously about the best thing ive ever seen on the net XD
[04:49] <Salamix> The giant cop one wan't as good
[04:52] <Salamix> The one after it was. I'm in actual tears.
[04:52] <Cait> hehehe
[04:52] <Cait> aww :D
[04:52] <Cait> i wish i'd have known you never saw this i'd link it earlier!
[04:55] <Salamix> Oh, done. Rhino still wings
[04:55] <Salamix> It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
[04:55] <Cait> I know
[04:56] <Cait> RHINOS DONT PLAY GAMES THEY FKIN CHARGE YOUR ASS
[04:56] <Cait> XDDDDDDDDDDDd
[04:56] <Cait> SO EPIC

 

then we talked about irl a bit.


[05:08] <Cait> nagami did ask you few days ago
[05:08] <Cait> "When did you start liking cait" and you said "Awhile ago"
[05:08] <Cait> <3 YOUR VAGUENESS
[05:08] <Salamix> It's not just with you you know!
[05:08] <Cait> but any specific time, when it hit you or something? Just curious
[05:09] <Cait> what do you mean, not just with me? o.o'
[05:09] <Salamix> The vagueness
[05:09] <Cait> oh
[05:09] <Cait> yeah i figured
[05:09] <Salamix> I don't really know, it jsut kind fo developed
[05:09] <Cait> it was w/ everyone
[05:09] <Cait> but oh :3
[05:09] <Cait> did you ever think about it, like that?
[05:09] <Cait> or
[05:09] <Cait> did you not think about it too much till i gave TEHSPEECH?
[05:11] <Salamix> I don't think I thought too much about it until then. I've got this bad thing where I need to be told or something to make it hit me.
[05:11] <Cait> Ahh i figured!
[05:12] <Cait> *takes note* *writes... "hit salam often"*
[05:12] <Cait> XD
[05:12] <Salamix> It was brewing for a long time though, I remember you asked what I thought back in june and I didn't give a yes or no
[05:12] <Cait> Yeah
[05:13] <Cait> no yes or no, does mean no until further notice though! lol
[05:13] <Cait> But yeah, June.. i felt bad bringing it up and stuff.
[05:14] <Cait> becuase im never the one to take iniative
[05:14] <Cait> and then i didnt really have the guts to bring it up again
[05:14] <Cait> I mean when we were in black swamp that one day
[05:14] <Cait> when i turned into baby cat
[05:14] <Cait> i almost did there
[05:14] <Cait> Cuz i was really having fun with you that day
[05:14] <Salamix> yeah
[05:14] <Cait> but i waited
[05:14] <Cait> then i couldnt sleep that one night
[05:14] <Cait> cuz i had fun with you again
[05:14] <Cait> XD
[05:15] <Cait> Oh god the next day was so bad though
[05:15] <Cait> i got like 2hrs of sleep or something ridiculous
[05:15] <Cait> and i was so nervous all day cuz i was guna paste it then, but then i was too dam tired to stay up
[05:15] <Salamix> heh
[05:16] <Cait> ooo i see
[05:16] <Cait> i figured though
[05:16] <Cait> that it hadnt changed...
[05:16] <Cait> because of what saber said
[05:17] <Cait> you liked me only as family
[05:17] <Cait> and thats why i was talkin a lot with other guys
[05:17] <Cait> cuz i was really sad that you didnt like me, so i was trying to push those feelings out the door, cuz i figured theyd never be returned ><
[05:18] <Cait> and this was pretty much gunna be the final "no", the closure, so i could move on, hopefully.
[05:18] <Cait> but it wasnt
[05:18] <Cait> OMGGgggggg
[05:18] <Cait> so happy, lol
[05:19] <Cait> and iniative.. Yeah
[05:19] <Cait> im bad.
[05:19] <Cait> youre bad.
[05:19] <Cait> this could be a problem!
[05:19] <Cait> something i been thinking about though,
[05:19] <Cait> actually something that hit me a bit while playing tetris too
[05:19] <Cait> esp, in the combo maps
[05:20] <Cait> Im in a competition VS you, where as in, I play to win, TO MAKE YOU LOSE, but we still have fun, and maybe, thats how it should be in other aspects, sort of
[05:20] <Cait> That maybe this time..
[05:20] <Cait> I HAVE to take the iniative on various things
[05:20] <Cait> and "wear the pants in this relationship"
[05:20] <Salamix> Isn't that how it should be?
[05:21] <Salamix> Er, I mean the make me lose party
[05:21] <Cait> Yeah
[05:21] <Salamix> Ugh, can't type
[05:21] <Cait> but you see, salam!
[05:21] <Cait> In my perfect world i live in sometimes
[05:21] <Cait> I never ever want you to lose or feel bad.
[05:21] <Cait> but in this case
[05:21] <Cait> the whole point is to make you lose, because its fun for both of us
[05:21] <Cait> and that doesnt register at all very well with me
[05:21] <Cait> and that hit me at some point tonight and im like "ohhhhhhhhhhhh"
[05:21] <Cait> that maybe
[05:22] <Salamix> Pfft, it's a game though. I enjoy challenges!
[05:22] <Cait> its good sometimes, to do things,
[05:22] <Cait> that dont neccisarily make you DIRECTLY happy?
[05:22] <Cait> or something?
[05:22] <Salamix> Yeah
[05:22] <Cait> I duno it was pretty deep and hard to explain
[05:22] <Cait> lol
[05:22] <Cait> and i think about all of this while trying to play too! XDDDDDDDDDD
[05:22] <Cait> no wonder im so bad sometimes
[05:23] <Salamix> You do good though
[05:23] <Cait> yeah
[05:23] <Cait> and youre better!
[05:23] <Salamix> I did another one of the types and went and destroyed everyone
[05:24] <Cait> i need to practice more
[05:24] <Cait> i know
[05:24] <Cait> everyone on that website sucks big time
[05:24] <Cait> LOL


05:27] <Cait> I've got mario party 2 and 4! XD
[05:28] <Salamix> I've got 4 too, most recent
[05:28] <Cait> oh~
[05:28] <Salamix> New games just mean new minigames really
[05:28] <Cait> we only got 4 recently
[05:28] <Salamix> Though, I think I liked 3s better
[05:28] <Cait> from a garage sale for $8!
[05:28] <Cait> i never played 3 <=/
[05:28] <Cait> i heard it was awesome
[05:28] <Cait> shane told us about this "Eatsa Pizza" minigame that was hella fun
[05:28] <Cait> also
[05:28] <Cait> POKEMON STADIUM MINIGAMES
[05:28] <Cait> also super fun
[05:30] <Cait> Lol now that i think about it, the night we got mario party 4, cory spent like 7 hours playing it
[05:30] <Cait> and i wouldnt come play with him cuz you were on XDDDDDDDDD
[05:30] <Salamix> lol
[05:30] <Cait> so he beat it by himself! XDDDDDDD
[05:31] <Cait> and initiative thing, again
[05:31] <Cait> mario party reminded me
[05:31] <Cait> and we did talk about it earlier a bit...
[05:32] <Cait> Something im very shy about, and really, its probably still too early to discuss... But im in one of those "CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING" phases.. (why must they always be on work nights??)
[05:32] <Cait> but if you dont like to take the initiative, about, like.. someday when you can come visit me ~_~ (again, early, i know)
[05:32] <Cait> you should prolly think about it a bit,
[05:33] <Cait> ive looked into it a bit already, and meh,
[05:33] <Salamix> Looked into it how?
[05:34] <Cait> as far as methods of transportation.
[05:34] <Cait> by car.. it's 10 hours 1 way.
[05:34] <Cait> sp00ny took amtrak.. closest amtreak to you guys is 60miles away, so i dont think thats really an option
[05:34] <Salamix> Wow
[05:35] <Cait> greyhouse bus, theres a station in watertown, which is like 10mins away, right? but the shortest time for that is 18hours 1 way, with 2 bus changes
[05:35] <Cait> im like, damn.. thats way too much.
[05:35] <Cait> i duno ANYTHING about flight travel.
[05:36] <Cait> so its kinda like ~_~ *out of ideas*
[05:36] <Salamix> 18 hours?
[05:36] <Cait> Yeahhhh
[05:36] <Cait> plus man
[05:36] <Cait> i duno wth your parents would think
[05:36] <Cait> or if theyd even let you
[05:37] <Cait> or if they even know i exist
[05:37] <Cait> XD
[05:37] <Salamix> Yeah, I haven't really said much about it
[05:37] <Cait> Totally understandable,
[05:38] <Cait> its something im very shy about w/ my dad too
[05:38] <Cait> i mean he didnt even knew you existed till the other night i rambled on
[05:38] <Cait> and i just told him "hes my best friend"
[05:38] <Salamix> Ah
[05:38] <Cait> cory knows, though
[05:38] <Cait> XD
[05:38] <Cait> but he doesnt care
[05:38] <Cait> all he goes is
[05:39] <Salamix> But yeah, it'd be a cool thing sometime, but who knows?
[05:39] <Cait> "I dont care about Salam, shut up"
[05:39] <Cait> XD
[05:39] <Cait> but who knows? o.o
[05:39] <Cait> you mean like, maybe no?
[05:40] <Salamix> Eventually
[05:40] <Cait> yeah.
[05:40] <Cait> But yeah, its early.. i just wanted to bring it up so you'd think about it occasionlly. cuz its very hard for me to talk about :x XD
[05:42] <Cait> XD but asides from... mario party! and things
[05:42] <Salamix> I actually have kind of, because I figure you'd say it sometime
[05:42] <Salamix> yeah, just random stuff, right?
[05:42] <Cait> mhm..
[05:42] <Cait> IRL youd be interested..?
[05:42] <Cait> in doing lovey-esque things?
[05:43] <Cait> ;x!
[05:44] <Salamix> Maybe. I don't know. We'd have to see when it happens
[05:44] <Cait> ohs o.o'
[05:44] <Cait> okayz
[05:44] <Cait> XD
[05:44] <Cait> ^^'
[05:44] <Cait> *will feel embarrased she asked tomarrrow*
[05:44] <Cait> XDD
[05:45] <Salamix> hehe

 

 

 

 

OOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGGg

*SO EMBARRASSSED******************

but only maybe?? he onlyMAYBE wants lovey stuff!?? oh noessssssssssssssssss............... ;_;.

well i guess we'll have to see then, i guess, right? Maybe he is weird, and i wouldnt like him.. (HA I DOUBT)

or he'll see how weird I am, and not like me.. *sigh~* and not wanna snuggle under the covers or something.

!_!


besides that though,

ugh <3!

his personality  + morals + values.

are so

perfect.

UTTERLY.


NOW OFF TO BED GOTTA BE UP FOR WORK IN 5HRS LOLLLLLLLLLllll

LMFAO

Sep. 22nd, 2009 12:16 pm
caitaro: (Default)
look what salam wanted me to draw him XD



HE IS TEH MOST RANDOMEST GUY IN THE WORLD I SWEAR XD <33333333333
caitaro: (Default)
The Speech



ALRIGHT SHUT UP EVERYONE IMPORTANT SPEECH TIME FROM CAIT. Then possibly from salam. o//o
In the past I've told you about how i feel somewhat, but not as directly as this.
And you've told me how you felt too, as if we were family.... And really I dont know
why I want this title so bad, or why it even matters at all.. No bloody idea......
I was afraid to go out and say it like this, but meow + others brought up a good point.
"If mix mix rejects you theres millions of other guys, besides why waste time hiding
your feelings, or doubting yourself or him?... JUST ASK HIM!" I thought "good point."
"Its better to get this over sooner than later, youre doing the right thing, because
if this isnt meant to be, you can move on, and not always just gunna keep you wondering"

and im embarrased too ^_^ you know i am. You always know.. Just what im thinking.. Or
what the best advice is.. Even when you dont go and say it directly, youre always teaching me.

People ask me "What is it about salam that makes you like him so much?" Really i Think and think
We have different interests, you like sports + being quiet. I like to read... and lead...
and to be abnoxiously noticeable (well online anyway).. But we make -such- a good team. Like
in Luna. We Date SO WELL there, because we just KNOW what to do. Theres no "BLARG WHY DIDNT
YOU DO THIS AND THIS OR THAT!??" We just.. succeed. Whereas with others, its a  total disaster,
and we both end up dying.......... In this situation..... People tell me, "Follow your heart"
and that was true with what people said about manic. Hes funny and nice, sure. A good friend.
But say I did go with him. That wont take away my feelings for you, I know it for sure.
Why Do i like salam? ?? I dont know. I dont think about it, i just -feel- it. I've never wanted
to make someone as happy as i try to make you. I do so much for you, because it makes me happy.

To see you happy, is what makes my day. Like i said before, when i first started out working
and it was hard, i got through the day thinking to myself "doing this well will please salam!"
and i know that that may sound creepy, but you give me -SO- much modivation to go out and
do my best, and really live, and try new things i normally wouldnt do. Its so weird, I know...

I do all my studies on relationships and even all these creepy 14 year olds, and I still dont
know what love is, at the core. Maybe its impossible to know. Hell, maybe it doesnt exist and
its all just a chemical overload in our brains. I often find myself thinking and thinking and
end up googling "define love" only to come to the conclusion of something like "Love is a
strong positive emotion of regard and affection". And regardless of if this is only online or
even only ingame.. or everywhere.  I have to get this all out.... Or i'll go crazy with
rambling on about you forever and ever to random people for hours on end XD and really only
dreaming, and not acting is a huge waste of time.........

I have to let my soul sing without a doubt!!!! No regrets! cuz otherwise id never know, right!
I think by now, I've shown it throughout the various situations we've been in in the past few
months, but I really just feel the need to vocalize it. Er.. type.. er.. something... :X!

In some way, shape, or form, Salam, I love you.
And it goes against every bit of logic and thought process the more I think about this next part
And the more I think about it, the more stupid it seems on my end... And it seems so silly, but
maybe being/feeling silly is what this is about! ^___^

Someone brought up a good point last night, actually. Which makes me understand why i feel the
way i do a *BIT* better. "Real love comes from not what you say, but what you do. The fact that
he is around you a ton re-enforces the fact he cares about you a lot as well. Whereas some of
the other guys you mention may flirt with you, sure, but they dont put the effort into SHOWING
they care on a day-to-day basis. And I know all too well that girls are suckers for attention
from a guy, but its the ones that don't show it directly are the ones who mean it the most."

and BAH I know this is different from what we talked about yesterday, but i thought it meant the
same thing cuz im a huge nub and stuff :3 blehhh ima feel bad about this tomarroowww >_<~~ xD

I cant think of any amusing or tactfully quirky way of asking this, especially since it doesnt
even make the least bit of sense to me in the first place. Either way this goes, as noted when
we first started talking... nothing will change our friendship we have now, regardless what
happens after im done with this :3 Maybe thats all this is, is a huge outlet of feelings.
(and ohhhhh god it is......) And it's okay if the answer is no, really it is. Because maybe the
answer -should- be no. But I dont know, uh anything at this point. *FLYYYYYS THROUGH WINDOW*

Salam, will you be my girlfriend?

*hides under popcorn machine in emo corner while heart beats incredibly fast* >////<~


------------

The Aftermath


 




The AFTER aftermath






This one will be longer than 2 weeks, i swear :/

<=/

Aug. 6th, 2009 11:24 am
caitaro: (Default)
so not having such a good day today. . . .

comp exploded this morning.. had to reformat n stufff...
other guild is being a-holes again. . . ><


uh
other stuff in general, i duno.


But most of all

i miss salam :(

hes still gone cuz of lack of power...

its been a lonely day. . .


and you know, how I used to just be sooooo... uber scared around him.. and how i liked him, and even asked him out, but (I WAS REJECTED ;_;)

the more i think about it,

maybe its for the better.. I still care about him more than anyone else in the world.. and we do things together...

and... i even dream about him the same as guys ive actually "been with" before in the past..

It's just... I duno.

I got this chicken soup on love book thing... and it shows, like.. how people were friends, then they went out, then everything went bad..

and really if i think about it..

What if he said yes, right now? What would change? ...nothing? besides maybe me doing more *Hugs*

but other than that i treat him as special as I think he deserves! As special as if he had said "yes!"

being IN a relationship... creates more drama, i think.. Than just friendship.. Because then it gives the, uh.. man i cant think of the word.. "things/feelings/actions you think you are supposed to carry out"

But, really.. Define friend? Define relationship? Where is the line inbetween those? Is there one?

Does there have to be?

I think we are more than friends. But really, to quote him.. "Putting you in a group is just lumping you in a group with others. To me, you are just you."

Maybe to us.. we are just us. Not "friends". Not in a "relationship". Maybe in a relationship of our own definition.

Relationship: a state of connectedness between people (especially an emotional connection)

Maybe what we have is better than being in a standard definition relationship. All the perks without the drama!~ XD

I'd love to discuss this with him, actually. But ill prolly loose the guts to. ^_^ ahahah.


but ahh.. i came out here because i couldnt sleep.. and upon rambling to myself (who reads this anymore, srsly.. noone i bet XD) I've discovered a deep conversation... with myself.. about love. :o


now i need to go get tired so i can sleep and go garage saling tomarrow @_@ XD
caitaro: (Default)
[02:26] <Cait> guild on luna is quiet
[02:26] <Cory> yep
[02:26] <Cait> im in some pm with some guy who is really nice
[02:26] <Cory> it is
[02:26] <Cory> your mom is quiet
[02:26] <Cait> um
[02:26] <Cait> On trickster
[02:26] <Cait> kia is logging in and out a lot
[02:26] <Cait> Guess you're doomed to talk to me again ;D
[02:26] <Cory> OHH NOOOES
[02:27] <Salamix> no escape. again
[02:27] <Cait> hopefully you're not too dissapointed.
[02:27] <Cory> ALWAYS are caiter tater
[02:27] * Cait gets out the fuzzy handcuffs
[02:27] <Cait> er...
[02:27] <Cory> omg..
[02:28] <Cory> RUN SALAMMM
[02:28] * Arlans has joined #memoirs
[02:28] * ChanServ sets mode: +ao Arlans Arlans
[02:29] <Cory> LANNNS YOUR BACKKK
[02:30] <Cait> LANS
[02:30] <Cait> you must
[02:30] <Cait> save salam
[02:30] <Cait> he's been FORCEd to talk to me all day
[02:30] <Cait> sve him!
[02:30] <Cait> from ME
[02:30] <Arlans> Sure
[02:30] * Arlans *bites Cait*
[02:31] <Cait> ow
[02:31] * Cait dies
[02:31] <Salamix> all day long
[02:31] <Salamix> I got on trickster and it was like a void
[02:31] <Salamix> I got on luna and it was like a void
[02:31] <Salamix> I got on mirc and it was like a void
[02:31] <Cait> except
[02:31] <Cait> only i was here
[02:31] <Salamix> Except for Cait on all 3
[02:31] <Cait> So im invisible
[02:31] <Cait> =(
[02:31] <Cait> im glad i mean so much to you
[02:31] <Cait> being a void n stuf
[02:32] * Cory samcks caits tuna sub while watching daddy daycare or whatever
[02:33] <Cait> LOL
[02:33] <Cait> that was anger management
[02:33] <Cait> which you need.
[02:33] <Cait> lol cory startd crying
[02:33] <Cory> ya
[02:33] <Cory> no
[02:34] * Cory eats caits face off
[02:34] <Cory> then throws at salam
[02:35] <Cait> wow
[02:35] <Cait> how did my face feel salam?
[02:35] <Salamix> uh...fleshy
[02:37] <Cait> lol
[02:37] <Cait> what if i was a donut in disguise
[02:37] <Cait> then that would be bad
[02:38] <Cory> OMG YES


DOOOOOOOOOOOMED

FOR EVAR

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